Generous Portions
I've had my pet
Since I was nine years old
I loved him and fed him
But one day he attacked
I knew he didn't love me back
So I grabbed him like a football
And punted fifty yards
Now I hate pets
Take yourself to the vet
Now I hate pets
Dolphins trapped in little nets
Now I hate pets
You little fucking
Screaming shit-bag
I should of let your mother
Eat you, little fucker
So I got a little birdy
And I trained it everyday
He knew 1000 words
But then he flew away
But then I got him back
The fucker wouldn't shut his trap
So I took him to the bathroom
And rubbed his beak in shit
Now I hate pets
Spotted owls in their nests
Now I hate pets
Bagged a deer and made a vest
Now I hate pets
Birds and bees and bears and bison
Pigs and parrots and pandas
I fucking hate them all!!!
I was walking through the park
When a snake peered from his hole
A perfect opportunity
To take the bastard home
I chopped his fucking head off
With my handy garden hoe
And made a lovely hat-band
For my redneck cousin Bo, heee-haaw!
Now I hate pets
10,000 volts to the chest
Now I hate pets
Fed my cat some cigarettes
Now I hate pets
You little fucking
Screaming shit-bag
bastard
Fuck you, you
Fucking pig-shit licker, fuck!!!!!!
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We recommend: What's A Broken Heart
The pope don't matter when the pawn is your sea,
Don't you agree?
When you're around I'm wound around your thumb
You wanna be numb inside the gun
I've been in pain hope it doesn't show
I've been insane well the time is slow
Don't you want sunshine instead of phony lights?
All your billboards in light
I want big fight against the baby inside
that your mistaking for pain!